How to Get Ahead at Work Without Kissing Butt

Most people think that if they kiss the bosses butt, the boss will like them and they will have a secure job with good advancement. Wrong!

To a business organization, an employee is just a tool, like a mop or shovel. When the tool gets old or is no longer needed, it's out the door without a flinch. If you kiss the bosses butt, they may smile at you and talk nice to you, but in reality they're thinking you're weak and pitiful. They will not hesitate to give you the crap assignments and use you as a fall guy for their mistakes.

You can have a secure job with good advancement - and keep your self-respect if you follow the rules below.

In business organizations, people gather into "cliques". A clique is a group of employees organized for the purpose of covering each others butt. This allows each member of a clique to pass the blame for their mistakes onto the other clique. In the end, one clique successfully destroys the chances for advancement of the members of the other clique. (Or gets the other clique tossed out of the company entirely).

Never join a clique. Always claim to be a devoted subject of managers so high in the organization that most of the employees don't have access to them. Always claim to be dedicated to "what's best for the company". Avoid taking sides in any issue that the cliques are doing battle over. By taking a side, you will be joining a clique.

There is no sure way to tell which clique will win in the end. The clique that seems to be winning today could get caught in a big screw-up tomorrow, and be out the door. Never join a clique.

Never associate with co-workers or your boss outside of work. If you associate with a co-worker outside of work, you will be joining that co-workers clique by default. If you associate with your boss outside of work, in order to avoid accusations of favoritism, your boss will be forced to give you crap assignments. Keep your work associations and your after work relationships completely separate.

Never bad-mouth a co-worker or a boss. No matter how private you think a conversation is, it WILL get out. And when it does - you will have joined a clique. The fact is, you don't need to bad-mouth a co-worker or a boss. Although it may not seem like it, everybody already knows who the big screw-ups in the company are.

Always bad-mouth everybody and everything outside the company. Bad-mouth suppliers. Bad-mouth contractors. Bad-mouth consultants. Bad-mouth the government. Bad-mouth everything outside the company. That's right - the company's problems are not caused by stupid lazy employees and managers. All the company's problems are caused by things outside the company.

Get ahead by taking the initiative and volunteering for assignments nobody else wants - Wrong!

In every company there are certain assignments that do not lead to advancement. The crap assignments. They are boring with low visibility or little chance of success. Then there are the other assignments that are exciting, involve gaining more skills, have high visibility and a good chance of success. These are the "glory" assignments.

They say "the cat that meows gets the milk". Always keep pestering your boss to give you the glory assignments. Always whine and complain when you get a crap assignment. If you get a crap assignment, lay a guilt complex on your boss. Make it clear that they now owe you a glory assignment.

"The early bird gets the worm". True - but the night hawk eats venison.

You will never get credit for arriving at work before everyone else - because they didn't see when you arrived. Always arrive at work late and then leave late. If you are still working when the other employee leaves, it makes them appear to be making less effort than you - even though they may have put in the same, or more hours than you did.

Do not arrive early AND leave late. That will cause you to get tired, burned out, and not perform at peak efficiency.

Every manager is indebted to their boss for every dollar in their department's budget. This means they must keep their department's salaries as low as possible. In your performance review, your boss is looking for every "bullet" they can use to "shoot down" your raise.

Keep a journal of every task that you complete successfully and every accomplishment that you achieve. In your performance review, your boss can be very forgetful. You need to come to the review with a few bullets of your own.

A group of employees is like a pack of wolves. Each employee jockeying for a more dominant position. To achieve domination over a fellow employee they have to prove they are more skilled than the other employee.

Schedule time every day to read and study material related to your profession and the business that your company is in. Continuously increase your skill level. This does not require putting in more hours at work or taking time at home. You can usually block out from 30 minutes to 2 hours during the workday for skill enhancement.

If you have a high skill level, you don't need to join a clique to cover your mistakes. When you make a mistake, you will have enough value to the company to be able to admit to the mistake without affecting your status in the company.

When you make a mistake say this; "I made a mistake and if the company doesn't like the way I work, they can hire who-ever is second best". This is a way of telling the company that even though you are human and make mistakes, you are still a highly skilled employee and a valuable asset to the company.

You CAN have a secure job with good advancement even if you have too much self-respect to kiss butt. When you follow the rules above, your bosses may not smile at you, but they will be handing you a big paycheck!

More Success at Work Information:
• Conflict and Politics at Work
• Gift Giving in the Workplace
• Coping with Difficult People
• Time Management
• Use the Power of a Negative Attitude to Get Ahead
• People Skills - Dealing with New Ideas
• Techniques - A Cluttered Desk
• Working on a Team
• Effective Networking For Professional Success
• Communicating With Your Boss