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How to Get Ahead at Work - Without Kissing Butt!
By Stephen Bucaro
Most people think that if they kiss the bosses butt, the boss will like them and they
will have a secure job with good advancement. Wrong!
To a business organization, an employee is just a tool, like a mop or shovel. When the
tool gets old or is no longer needed, it's out the door without a flinch. If you kiss
the bosses butt, they may smile at you and talk nice to you, but in reality they're
thinking you're weak and pitiful. They will not hesitate to give you the crap assignments
and use you as a fall guy for their mistakes.
You can have a secure job with good advancement - and keep your self-respect if you
follow the rules below.
In business
organizations, people gather into "cliques". A clique is a group of employees organized
for the purpose of covering each others butt. This allows each member of a clique to pass
the blame for their mistakes onto the other clique. In the end, one clique successfully
destroys the chances for advancement of the members of the other clique. (Or gets the
other clique tossed out of the company entirely).
Never join a clique. Always claim to be a devoted subject of managers so high in the
organization that most of the employees don't have access to them. Always claim to be
dedicated to "what's best for the company". Avoid taking sides in any issue that the
cliques are doing battle over. By taking a side, you will be joining a clique.
There is no sure way to tell which clique will win in the end. The clique that seems to
be winning today could get caught in a big screw-up tomorrow, and be out the door.
Never join a clique.
Never associate with
co-workers or your boss outside of work. If you associate with a co-worker outside of
work, you will be joining that co-workers clique by default. If you associate with your
boss outside of work, in order to avoid accusations of favoritism, your boss will be
forced to give you crap assignments. Keep your work associations and your after work
relationships completely separate.
Never bad-mouth a
co-worker or a boss. No matter how private you think a conversation is, it WILL get out.
And when it does - you will have joined a clique. The fact is, you don't need to bad-mouth
a co-worker or a boss. Although it may not seem like it, everybody already knows who the
big screw-ups in the company are.
Always bad-mouth
everybody and everything outside the company. Bad-mouth suppliers. Bad-mouth contractors.
Bad-mouth consultants. Bad-mouth the government. Bad-mouth everything outside the company.
That's right - the company's problems are not caused by stupid lazy employees and managers.
All the company's problems are caused by things outside the company.
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